“It has been said that friendship isn't one big thing, it's a million little things. That is certainly true for a group of friends from Boston who bonded under unexpected circumstances. Some have achieved success, others are struggling in their careers and relationships, but all of them feel stuck in life. After one of them dies unexpectedly, it's just the wake-up call the others need to finally start living. Along the way, they discover that friends may be the one thing that can save them from themselves.”
Have you seen this new show on ABC? I am hooked…and think it is one of the best shows this fall season. If you haven’t seen it, but now may be interested in watching it, I won’t spoil it for you. Those of you who have seen it, you know what I am talking about when I say it is riveting and you don’t want the show to end each week.
It made me think about my group of friends, I call them my tribe and there are a million little things why they are all in my life. Some have been in my life for 40+ years, some for just a couple years but it feels like a lifetime.
We all bring life stories to the group. Some of us are married (some more than once), some are divorced, some have children, some don’t. Some have careers inside the home, some outside the home. Some battle serious illnesses and live with that fight every day. Some have created their own businesses, some have started non-profits, and some have lost someone they love. Some have had to address depression, sexual assault, abuse (both physical and mental), alcoholism, drug abuse and homelessness.
We have all laughed, cried, celebrated, voiced our frustration, picked up the pieces for each other, discussed what we would all do if we won the lottery, pushed each other to look at the world in new and different ways, supported each other through the most difficult time, provided love when we didn’t think we deserved to be loved and laughed so hard that one of us may have pee'd our pants more than once!
Why am I writing about this….I was asked recently by a teenager how he could make more friends as he and his girlfriend had broken up and they had a lot of friends together but now he felt he only had a few friends now as kids that age, take sides. He had a couple of close friends but they were still in relationships so they didn’t have a lot of extra time to hang out with just him. Do you remember high school and that pain and confusion when you lost a friend?
We talked about the ways he could meet new people, how he had to put himself out there to be open to meet new people and to understand that not all friendships are meant to last a lifetime. This was a lesson I didn’t learn until I was an adult. I read the poem below and it has helped me understand my friendships and the ebbs and flow of friendships in our lives.
Do we need friends? Absolutely! However, you have to surround yourself with people who are going to lift you higher, not tear you down.
As we head into 2019, it is a good time to take stock of your friendships. You cannot hang out with negative people and expect a positive life.